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An unedited un cut roughnraw random scribble Trailer of a novel in makeby Naresh Sonee Part 1 Humble Wise Reader is suggested not to read in one go in hurry and only read when your good self is in relaxed mood and really desire to read something novel which you never read before Disclaimer This is not at all impish write up But even than core impulsive religious fundamentalists may leave this site as their mindsets due to short temperament and narrow mindless approach may refuse to adjustnalter with current updated times The scientific spiritualism which certainly respect GOD the creatorsustainerdestroyer but also view spirituality with a logical telescope and rational microscope and certainly don t mind to scan and understand the broad spectrum of spiritual waves by separating age old dried flakes of myths Knowledge hungry always strive to engage in brain brawl or brain storming sessions So only wise spirituals who are wisdom hungry and wish to see the next generation with updated flawless spiritualism may wear their spiritual thinking cap because they are certainly welcome here to readncomment as guests Humble appeal is hereby made to read this rough spiritual trailer of fiction novel in 23 breaks It s a test drive to evaluate wisdom of today As its a peculiar genre created by the author Naresh Sonee so reading in haste and in between lines would end in blurred bruised or brittle thinking The authors believe in spreadingnsharing his logical spiritual thesis free to humankind An Enlightened Master Leaves For Heavenly Abode Chapter 1 An Enlightened Master Sri Sri 1008 Kar Mund Nareshwar Maharaj was MBBS from AIIMS Delhi studied Ayurveda and Hindu cult philosophy in his early years In his test drive days after fruitless attempts done for his inner ambitions he noticed that in India the career option were not better than abroad so finally he migrated and settled down in New York 1968 He did his mythical practiced not only in US but his 7 Stars ashrams got spread all over the world in all major cities rapidly His trust and foundation got recognition and earned saintly reputation gaining amass wealth due to his daily seminars discourses and grant accepted on websites Be it Vedas Ramyana or Mahabharata Like a parrot the enlightened master could recite all shlokas bhajans mantras without looking at the printed holy scripted books those demonstratedndictated that mythological ancient era This Master of Vedic religion became a renowned Hindu mythology caretaker and preacher He had one more feathern feature to his advantage that he was a birth born romantic musical love guru Todate he had millions of followers spread all around the world to his credit This profession made him a honourable celebrity not only among Hollywood celebrities popnrock stars but among sect of educated class too People in US and around the globe also gave him a nick name DrKeep Up Opra and many people also called him Shri Shri Swami 1008 Kavi Funkar Maharaj This holy professional updated Swami was more hit than Winfrey Oprah Tom Cruise and equally famous like Bill Gates Pope Benedict or Monk Dalai Lama Saint Ved Vyas And Sant Valmiki Did Not Knew Nareshwar Maharaj39s meditative pirated poetic musical shows and discourses picked from the Vedas Ramayana Mahabharata earned him not only holy goodwill of a seer but accumulated for him lot of wealthnassets adding to his holy seer full empire 39reehaasat39 And additionally this progress was made without even paying any royalty to ancient celebrities authors like Saint Ved Vyas and Sant Valmiki These poor two fellows who were the actual authoritative authors of the said holy books genre never in dream must had thought how all new age professional gurus would take over their bearings and became Holy tycoons in future eras Vedas and Mahabharata was authored by saint Ved Vyas ji whereas Ramayana was written by seer Valmikhi ji So far not a single temple wasis raised by any modern guru for these two creative holy authors whose souls have been departed Today such great true and sincere Enlightened Saintly Souls who gifted acquaintednequipped all gurus of today by imparting their knowledge free never ever thought in their dream that these thoroughly professed modern caretakers of religion would hold self certified doctorates of these ancient authors scriptures Needless to debate these well professed Hindu s holy gurus of today who pirated and lifted the literary works of these two great ancient authors are however instrumental and engaged in spreading ancient holy scripturesndeities In the present scenario many corporate magnates envy and stands no where if wealthnassets or famenfortune are comparednconcerned of modern professional saints May those be Parvachans YogasnAyurvedas ShlokasnTrilokas TantrasnMantras Sri Sri 1008 Kar Mund Nareshwar Maharaj was well professed in all This was the best occupied biz of many professionals competitive saints who were seriously busy selling their religious Avatars without even getting webbed in court cases of creative rights issues as happens in film or artistic fraternities of today when they steel each other ideasnrights for their personal gains of innovative show offs Today nobody can use batman superman without permission of creative rights of the authorsnowners But yes anyone can freely use Religious Avatars to build their ashramsnempires Chapter 2 Maharaj Swami Baba In Ecstatic Mood To his surprise when the 1008 Baba Shri Nareshwar Maharaj was in merry rejuvenating mood all of a sudden while learning to play guitar and trying to play a song of Sir Elton John among gay community in Birmingham he was called off by his Hindu God No prior notice or summon was issued By the time the popular saint had no time to even greet good bye to his gaynstraight lesbiannbisexuals friends who all regardednhonoured him a lot from their depth of heart Neither he was allowed to take along holy books or few dollars After a small skirmish struggle the Swami Maharaj offered his surrender to Yamraj the God of Death and left peacefully for heavenly abode without any further tiffntussle ifsnnoseither or whether Swamiji s soul was out from the party organised by his well wishers for him The happening unhappy moment for him was inevitable During his flight the yogi was numbed mum bed clueless and shocked On the gate of Swarg The heaven of Hindus He was allowed some prasadasncharnamatas Those happened to be holy diary milk made sweet barfis along with Ganges water This was the welcome snackndrink After some security check and as because the Yamraj was uncomfortable and non cooperative had some objection with Modern Swami39s personal lifendeath issue So atlast this huffing murmuring Swami Nareshwar ourff Shri Shri Kavi Funkar Maharaj was finally summoned to God Lord Krish The Court Darbar Of Lord Krish Lord Krish appeared in his unique signature style He was in his old ancient mythological garments His persona contributed a yellow silk dhoti having broad green silk border and a maroon stole duppatta with thin silver border and dark green and golden mesh dots in it to match The protein fibre of silk is composed mainly of fibroin and produced by certain insect larvae to form cocoons The bestknown type of silk is obtained from the cocoons larvae of the mulberry silkworms Bombyx mori reared in captivity sericulture The shimmering appearance of silk is due to the triangular prism like structure of the silk fibre which allows silk cloth to refract incoming light at different angles thus producing different colours The silk stole and dhoti along with various ornaments were not shy or afraid so enjoyed all rights luxuries and privileges and went all over and around covering and at the same time revealing shoulders and neck and other part of Lord s body In a whistling pose the great Lord stood with right foot across the left with a slight twistn bend to his front leg He held a silver diamond studded flute with both of his lovely caressing hands Needless to say the Lord s sense of dressing still would give any of the Hollywood stars or Greek Gods run for money The way this Indian God used the vibrant colours in his ward robes appeared phenomenal His attitude still ruled and defined the religious trends The 1008 Maharaj Nareshwar after his own death realized he had done no mistake in apingnimpersonating this heroic Lord for whom he incredibly talked tirelessly in his daily discourses poems and hymes Many of Lord s legendary tales had became classics and not faded with trendsntimes This romantic Lord damn cared what people talked behind him His extra marital affairs with Radha or thousands of women in his young age are classic tales to remember which every James Bond ponder upon This Lord never lived life like Marayadha Purushutom Ram who livednleft the world for his only one wife Sita Neither any religious competitive Avatars emulated Lord Krish May they be Jesus Zoro Abraham Moses Mohamed Tao Buddha Mahavir Nanak Sai Baba or Mother Teresa all approached their spiritual world either seriously or differently Other religions39 Avatars probably were not so mischievous fun loving enthusiastic curious or romantic warriors A glowing sun like device was on back of Lord s head Perhaps that was a luminous aura of this fascinating Avatar Needless to refuse the stakes of this God and the very lively presence of his charm and aura which certainlynof course can bring down all Hollywood and Bollywood charismatic pretty blondes of brainsnbeauties run weak to knees Apart on his lobes this Lord never used any tribal body piercing bones and twigs to pierce in his brows tongue cheeks and nipples The Lord displayed no crazy tattoos There were no french cut or full grown beard or any moustache for public show off to prove his manly adrenalinenerotic guts In heaven also he remained unperturbed There too He was crowned with all precious stones Navratnas jewelleries and clipped a peacock feature on his curly black hairs Mere a golden circular bar bells having pearls hanged on each on both of his ear lobes Some necklace wrist bands armlets and anklets he shielded as complementarynsupplementary ornaments Garlands of flowers and rudraksha covered his cleaned chest and six fold abs There was not a single hair to disturb his metro sexual status Nobody could judge that this Lord was bornnbrought up in ancient villages such as Mathura and Dwarka The Lord carried himself so well and had no pimple His dark bluish toned smooth body had a natural face lift without even rigorously perspiring in gym The Lord without using Gillette product was clean shaved and well maninpedi cared His few counted grey strokes of hairs near the ears side locks proved that he had yet not dyed his black densely thick curly hairs Beside on a table were spread every variety of fruits and diary made sweets milk butter meethai However as said close to his glowing pink smoochy lips the charming God held a silver diamond studded flute He was just about to blow the flute and play it in all sandal wood and rose aroma of incenses But no sooner he realized that a darban was there with a modern kalyugi saint The handsome intriguing heroic Lord got bit conscious and alert but he turned around with aplomb while reminding himself that he was assigned a crucial job of a Justice for few days as Lord Shiva the Tri Netra God was on leave holidaying in Himalayans Probably with or without his spouse family bull moon and snake On seeing these two entering The Lord gave an aristocratic mien look The flute disappeared from his hands Soon the Lord occupied himself and sat on throne made out of diamond studded platinum gold He raised his right hand index finger pointing up the sky All of a sudden without hullabaloo a spiky zig saw thin steel metal disc wheel appeared and started speedily rotating in more than 50 000 RPM It appeared as a dentist drilling motor or wood cutting drilling wheel From distant it also look like a sharp curved blades rotating like a mini exhaust fan pointing upward It make some people still wonder was that a multipurpose devicetool This was Lord s sudharshan chakra to kill his enemies cum sinners who may refuse to abide or go against his village made laws of his land The Lord had his own outlook for his 39reveals39 pertaining to oldnancient universal clauses His do s and don t still existed was the prove that this heaven revealed Chapter 3 What made Lord Shiva Leave His Darbar The present replacement was assigned to Lord Krish as the innocent Lord Bhola Bhandari Shiva was probably busy He left for Himalayas giving a short notice to Brahma He was on a research mission while stressedntensed so went to meditate freshnupdate himself to encounter and counter attack the new scientific world of test tube babies and all sort of cloning in progress He still could not make out why madncrazy cunning human scientists on that tiny earth were promoting such activities shamelessly He was also very upset for childrennadults surfing porn sites bisexuals spouse swapping orgy paedophile sex etc Lord Shiva was updated by some recent saintsninformers and now knew that lotnall sort of poultry and animal farming are mush rooming on his earth Lord Brahma as usual was sitting and observing silent as a spectator Rapes orgy sex sex changes of gaynlesbians donors of sperms films like Vicky donors etc All such information some modern saints gave in their pen drives But Lord Shiva did not knew how to operate laptop and computer Neither there was electricity available in heaven He had no connectnaccess even to latest mobiles gadgetsngizmos In his days Avatar Shiva never owned luxury fleet of cars and 7 stars ashrams which today modern saints use He was still living in cow s ghee fuelled oil lamps while riding on the same old bull All such sinful acts had disturbedndiffused all Lord Shiva s formulas and programming of previous birthndeath Unlike in his respective sane eras people on earth were now mushroomingnbreeding infinitely like germs beesnmosquitoes How to counter them was the main aimnmissions of this meditation So Lord Shiva once again wanted to gear up and work glove in hand with Lord Krish and Lord Brahma as all sort of tsunami floods blizzard storms draughts were not yielding enough results to counter burgeoning peoples who were shamelesslynaudaciously going out of control Lord Krish was bit worried as he had to cancel and postpone all his programmes dates and salsas rambhas and raaslilas He did also wanted to practice Bollywood dance Pretty Radha and so many beautiful married women souls were awaiting for him impatiently No body could had doubt that his Lord still may be holding many women s souls who would be ready to swoon over him The Lord re reminded himself that he was assigned an important job by Lord Brahma and his extra circular activities could await for next few days Lord Krish knew Other fleet of Gods like Indra and so could not be allowed or trusted for such all significant assignment of livesndeaths which needs thorough investigations and audits The assignment was forwarded to Him seeing his experience and prompt action in Mahabharata The darban left the Enlightened Soul Nareshwar in front of Lord and disappeared after offering a sincere well obeyed bow Sri Sri 1008 Kar Mund Nareshwar Swamiji keep his points in front of Lord Krish As usual Lord Krish was prompt in action He never wasted a single second and asked to the Enlightened Master holding a contemplative look Sri Sri 1008 Kar Mund Nareshwar Swamiji aap is waqt meri adalat may ho aap aapne aap ki pervi yahan svem karoge so Tanik sanshebd may yeh bataao aap ne apne majhabdharm aur desh ke liye kyakya kiya aur kyon Mai aur koi sawaal ya behass nahi karunge Aap ke paas keval 100000 shan bakaida hai ye pal aapko dobara nahi milege The God meant to say Mr Mr 1008 Kar Mund Nareshwar Swamiji You are now in my court here you will fight your own case Just tell me down there on earth what all you did for your caste religion country You have mere 10 minutes ahead And as a rule you would not be allotted a second more Your time starts now The Lord makes a small clapping sound by creating a friction pressingsnrubbing his middle finger with thumb against each other In hindi it is said 39ungliyo se chutki bajana39 The Enlightened Master Nareshwar was baffled bit scared but he also never wasted a single second With his rejoinder he instantly started in his South Indian essence in English Hare Krishana Hare Rama You are my Shiva Vishnu Geetha Brahma Ved Purana God my Param Pita Parmeshwar Aapko Nat Nat Mastak Koti Koti Pranaam but God before I start let me tell you I am very much peeved with you I can t even add here dialogue that agar jaan ki salamat rahe to kutch arz karu if you spare my life Lord may I tell something as I am already dead So first of all I would like to add This was not the way to deal with your loyal agent and call me off all of a sudden without any clue or prior notice Lord let me tell you I am very much annoyed with you for calling me without a intimation why you did so there were so many commitments down there howevereven when I did so much 39akhand mrityunjaya jaap39 tried to win over my death by decoding and reciting primitive spells all such remedies you promotednrecommended yourself in scripture but its severely shocking that you called me off Is this the way to deal with your sincere religious agent I was your go between among you and your followers Anyway as I know your rule once dead always dead so I would not ask you to send me back again in the same body as my body is too fragile wrinkled and diabetic since 40 years I suffered from high bp too Secondly as after death in heavennhellonly truth is allowed so allow me to put the whole truth in front of you to what39s happening down And Lord please permit me to talk in my home style and not how I talk in public during giving discourses You very well understand there we have to change our voice to be serious effectivelynpolite mode otherwise people won39t take younme seriously if I portray you with regular language You see many devotees cameras are there to watch us down on earth So I would give myself a start treating you my own father and I would talk with you in my original tone which I use in my home with my family I used to keep my points with my father too My father was friendly like you and encouraged healthy debate even when I doubted him he cleared all my doubts pleasingly so the same I expect from you here Coming to my point God Lord You too may be aware though controversies and me never stayed away from each other But even you cannot deny the fact Lord I had pamperednhonoured you throughout my life and so I would request if you ever intend to oblige please give me a new freshnflesh revealing body which should later turn on in a beautiful hollywood or bollywood female soul so that I may not struggle and try hard for famenfortune You know how tiring is to sustainnmaintain primitiveness of a saint Or you can make me Tom Cruise or Salman Khan even They enjoy down a lot without fear of religion which we saint have They are free to romance anynmany People down there worship them more than you So lay down no if s and but do s and don t and never restrict me this time to enjoy in Bangkok too Why there should be different rules for you and me Lord Haven t you enjoyed and romanced a lot in your days The saint Maharaj Nareshwar dares to be impetuousnimpertinence And coming again to your point Lord I will say At my initial days and in my struggling days my MBBS was not enough to make any impact of mine or your name It was a tedious struggle And you know there down the world s lane the competitionncorruption was also too tough and we gurus have to act urgent on holy tv paid channels like aastha sanskar god etc One miss make the client move to other We have to invest lot on our advertisements from donors fund Needless to remind you there are too many races religions so many countries and cultures All down the lanes are quarrelling like catsndogs snakesnvultures You see Lord In our country India nobody took me seriously as doctor I was pushed to a remote village by my municipal seniors to serve hopeless casualty there so my Lord after I became follower of Sri Sri 108 Mahesh Satynanada Yogi if you remember he was my firstnlast Guru who taught me how to make Hollywood people pop stars fly high in air with fluttering yoga waving handsnbuttocks Everything changed from the day this announcement was made His followers grew and sproutednspread like yeast And as this guru of mine did not knew English well so I became his interpreter People took notice of me too And rest is history Many court cases I had to answer when people could not fly with my Guru39s claims of yoga so I amicably separated from him Chapter 4 Lord You see followers are so foolish over there in US and UK or Europe They don t take their own Avatar seriously Many spoofs are made on Shri Jesus ji People say he was not heroic and brave warrior like you So this innocent modest dignified sober weak wise non fighter 39Seer A Son of God39 was crucified at his early age People find sense in following brave fearless romantic fascinating magical promising result oriented 39God of Sense39 who takes quick decision whether romance politics and handle every situation diplomatically A God who is boldndaring have a knack of romance musicndance He should know Salsa Rambha Belly Dance Raslillas otherwise what39s the meaning of getting a simple Avatar assignment like lonely Nanak Sai Baba Mother Teresa Kabir etc These poor fellows were very serious and boring for hollywood peoples Fun loving people says these poor avatars wasted enough of their golden times opportunity and lives in serving poor distress peoples It seems enjoying romancing dancing battling for them appeared sin I personally don39t understand what was going into their mindi personally find them boring old rigid personswith all ifs and butsor say no guts Neither they enjoyed nor they allowed others to enjoy how to erase sorrow hunger disease was their only aim so boring and serious they were They want a friendly caring God like you who sometime kind heartedly helps few of his poor friend choosing from a lot You gave a very seerly example by extending emotional helping support only to one of your poor friend Sudhama Rest of the poor handicap distress from your home village or from the world you forgotnot me Honourable Lord but people sarcastically says to me But many followers At the same time want to believe surrender to a wealthy kingly handsome romantic warrior Deity like you You are hit in such followers39 mindthey are stunned to know your glorifying mahimaas from me A avatar who can hold mountains on his little finger tip effortlessly for seven days not at all budging from his position A avatar who can get away with all sort of illsnevils effectsndefectsis none other than you Lord i know and so i bow to you A avatar who is cared hugged and pampered by all beautiful women since birth People also love Lord Shiva as avatar who summoned sun in his village and clipped moonnriver on his hairs effortlessly for years Though I gave lot of discourses on You and Lord Shiva God But what sometime bother me to ponder upon that do Lord Shiva dismantle moon river and cobra while eating sleeping romancing or peeing And yes what about this sudarshan chakra hownwhen you gives rest to your flute and disc weapon Lord bluntly stared and sustained his dignified mien look offering his short costly smile Anyway Lord followers love your stories down on earth how you chewed poisonous breastnnipples of that evil lady who on pretext of offering milk tried to give you poison when you were infant I tried to convince my English followers that how Your Holiness without even conspiringnpressurizing successfully convinced Arjuna to kill so many peoples in Kureskshtra s in Haryana Punjab Lord I tried hard to explain them citing your example a friend in need is a friend in deed I elaborated them with each details hownwhat you did in for helping some five princely brothers who were your best friends And hownwhy with non foolishness they lost their entire wealth and only wife Panchali in that non stupid holy betting I tried hard to explain them why Draupadi was wife of five Pandaya brothers 5x1 I explained the followers how an unprincipalized prince Droyadhan who happened to be the cousin of five brothers hatchednwebbed a plan with the help of his mama uncle Shakuni to bring those innocent five bros on road by luring and defeating them in bet But you see Lord today many atheist are impious trouble makers They have started matching you with Bush and say that you for 1 Saddham that 1 Droyadhan killed millions of innocentnignorant soldiersnanimals Might though those be your un calculative moves as you did not knew in your times how modern countries and UN laws would shape up I can understand your Esteemed Self may non intentionally or ignorantly or unknowingly provoked Arjuna and his four brothers and made so many children fatherless so many parents childless so many wives husband less so many sisters brother less to settle your scores Moreover these atheist have their own notionsnmindsets that you unnecessary poked your nose in few cousins affairs and killed so many humansnanimals unreasonably justifying all as crucial need of that hour They say your Lord never kept cool and tolerance and ended in conspiring and murdering enemies Never You tried to explain amicably that war and murder is badnot me Lord but those rascals says Lord you know how difficult is for we gurus today to argue your case down the lanes You know how Court Laws UN these foolish rationalist people behave and squabblenmurmur today They are real pain in the a They say that you could had killed Droyadhan alone with your high RPM sudarshan chakra avoiding the war of mind boggling mass hysteria and bloodsheds They say as holy Avatar you should39nt had extra marital affairs with Radha and so many other women They ask why don t you lived celibacy life like holy committedntrustworthy Hanuman ji They say what made you reject Lord Ram39s principalized life and why you refused to emulated his character as your senior So many allegations and irritating questions I was made to answer Peoples says It does not suit God dancing with other women apart from his own wife I tried to convince hard that there are some over 330 million mythological Hindu deities and they live together in heaven like un separable onions peels They are connected to each other but you know those nasty fellows sarcastically stare at me some even laugh at me and among these 330 millions avatars how many of them were Krishna39s wives 16000 And were all 16000 wives were avatras too why and how These foolish trouble makers tease me that He be God or President Clinton or Dalai Lama or Pope Bendict etcall are not permitted to keep illicit affairs and should keep distance from girls like Monica Lewinsky They are responsible people of society country religion or world and people emulates them So they should not waste time in romancing and dancing all the time and focus on spirituality religion or all crucial works they are assigned by society country or world Lord you see Though I posed as a Brahmacharya Celibacy throughout my career I kept my arguments with all these wicked atheist trouble makers for you and tried hard to convince them that you are God and can do and get away with all such killingsncruelties in your self created or implemented wars I advocated that you are Lord of world and above universe so its your wishnwill to care or kill anyone I said you as Lord Ever Almighty are not answerable to anybody except Self I explained them everything is fair in lovenwar Not we human but you as God can flirt with others females and hold as many wives and girl friends as you wants but they refuse to get confuse and teased a honourable professed dignified saint like me Well I tried to explain that you rescuednfreed thousands of women from repeatedly raped by Rakshash Narkasura and when their own families refused to accept these innocent young attractive females and every one refused to marry them So You as Holy Lord instead makingntreating them your sisters daughters preferred to make all females converting them in your thousands of wives in one go i can fully empathy your case Lord SoShouldn t all saints like us do the same You see It s our moral bound holy duty every priest of any religion must do so and make as many wives if the need of the hour arise and they are being rapedbut you see They accused me of exhibitingnpretending outdoor celibacy and posing non celibacy in doors Those fkers atheists say why don t you stick to one stand that what all your millions of avatars actually wants They ask me again and again why your Lord Krish didn t behaved like sincere Lord Rama Maryadha Purshotum committed to one wife They accused me too of double standard and made an MMS on me and hosted on you tube Lord tell me Was I wrong in keeping Devdaasis Isn t such women permitted in our scriptures those beautiful women you yourself had allowed to serve us as temple hostess After I explained about your miraclesnmysterious avatars and said Vishnu Ram Krishna are onensame They refuse to buy my claimnstakes Down there in world Your love for raas leelaas only HollywoodnBollywood celebrities pop stars agreesnunderstand They found you interesting too They say you are a Restrictless Lenient Non Fussy God Theyntheir fans love you sincerelynseriously They agree thatno doubts you are a mysterious cum non fussy God of romance and ready to teach lessons for traitors Today HollywoodnBollywood are eager desperate to worship you They sing Hare Krishna Radhe Radhe by their lanesnveins and swear upon you and your mistress Chapter 5 My Lord After people get name fame money they don t mind spending or donating money to us to build our 7star ashrams gifting us Pagani Lamborghini BMW Rolls Royce Benz Ferrari on barter of exchange offer of getting blessing from us Gone are the days of your bullock cartsnhorse chariots Gods Today we give discourses on our laps and by air We have our own chauffeurs pilotsnplanes Internets GPS and power supply is spread all over your planet The world had switched off your oil lamps of your primitive dark days But you see Lord When those bastds atheists asks dodging puzzling questions God I found no answer why you Lords were magically incapable to invent electricity bulbs and bicycles during your tenures Followers ask me why could Lord You never created bulb or bicycles or simple electric city with your magical powers in your era And how you moved and stayed in dark days where by still magically summoning sunsnmoons to your villages and ordered riversnseas stands on to their toes They wonder who gave light to the other part of the world when sunnmoon visited you in your home town and village in India But making them understand what and who are you where are you is like doing hundred rounds of your hell My Lord you see it was very difficult for me at initial stage to make them self realize Because Your extra marital affairs done in your days comes in between our holy celibacy discourses Then I have to switch on to Lord Hanuman so that they don t alleged that my discourses are spreadingninfecting them with erotism in the name of God But you see when we are in European market modern professed Gurus like us had made all such extra circulars activities common now Its part of prayersnmediations chakrasnmantras There is no need for divorce I allowed my followers to proceed in extra marital affairs as one husbandn wife formula is outdatednobsolete not working Now too it s all same as during in your era So live in relationship practice is thrillingnadventurous and common now We can t say we have progressed but it had sustained since your age The Enlightened Master went on on and dauntlessly re started Lord I tried my best to explain them Daily taught all followers transcendence meditation quantum theory art of living different assanas of yogas kundalini openings and poses I gave them proper anatomynmorphology where chakras and kundalis are hanged insidenoutside human39s and animal s body Your holy cow s examples I routinely gave how to extract milk ghee butter from all holy mother s cows Millions of devotees must offer daily morning spa to Lord Shiva and you with tonnes of cow39 smilk I regularly explained them this is not at all cruelty to animalsI said I made them believe that the mother cow loves to be milked and squeezed by human who drink and offer milk to Lords in resort temple of yours whcih later flow in sewere I had regularly announced that our preferencenright to milk all and every lovely motherly cows is our birth rights and more justified than offering that tonnes of milk to poor or her calf children Cow farming biz is on a rise after you openly endorsedn announced You see it s the need of modern era too Lord thank you on behalf of the world and humanity race in all you certified the best mean to extract calcium and B12 from all our motherly cows by squeezng her breasts Its 100 humanism But those idiot vegan atheist says your cowboy God shouldn t had behaved selfish as he was enlightened he should had spared the holy cows breast atleast Any way God don t mind what those jealous atheist says let us focus on our aim for what we are meant for You see Lord I regularly explained my followers How to separate conscious mind from the conscience of head Sub conscious mind from the un conscious brainnheart The subtle mind that tempt for all illusion Maya which you Lord had made I tried to explain them that your gifted world is actually delusion Maya and nothing else I explained them about your mayavi illusions and how randomly you made the world from mere a scratch and created a big bang some billon trillion years ago I also explained about you How you made God particle how you conductncarry sustainnmaintain the magnetic infinite de quorum of planets stars moons and suns in universe All type of infinite galaxies which you spelled and swelled infinitely for a noble cause and clause for your own interest And your main intentionnattention was to elevate holy Hindu human only and their holy Hindu souls only that s all animals are animals they are useless dont ponder uponthey don t have painnsense like human They don t have tearsncries I explained them all about yours vastu shastras chakras havans rituals pilgrimages palmistry and astrology kundalini openings I tried to gelnblend them with other religions their fengshui tarot cards frogsnturtles etc How God you made eachnevery attempt to make people realize that you are there for them and you carencure and genuinely want to lovenlived with them still in peace But atheist doesn t believe you They say you don t look with equal eyes You were King and only friends of Kings You gave no formula to elevate hunger distressndefected people from the earth If so what makes you busy in confusing people first giving them birth and then forcing them to die in previous birth programming They ask what your religious God gain in settingnsettling previous birthndeath programme in his own moodnmodes Had all religions assertedngave approval to your Lord Which other religions had endorsedncertified him vagera vagera etc etc I tried to explain your followers down and also those black sheep scientist etc these devils who are fooling fingeringntingling around inventing mind boggling rockets missiles biological weapons and bombs for terror and fights animalsnhuman clones poultry farms etc I tried to make them understand that you can t only produce infinite beings as it would be difficult for my Lord to meet demandnsupply of infinite souls Even I understand in open sperm era how could you meet so many demand and supply of souls and that too of other religions Its duty of their respective Prophets to maintainnsustain demandnsupply of their caste souls when people would go n breeding like mosquitoes and germs what s your fault And why our religion would take responsibility of supplying other religion39s souls You see Lord children are popping up like popcorns not only by rapes but also with standard love in between young children I can empathy how could you control and keep accounts of infinite births by rapes people not using condemn people practicing group sex children coming out like mustard seeds form test tubes and not wombs cloning donor s spermsetc i can understand how difficult is to control and meet demandnsupply of the entire world God i have an idea the best way is to stop supplying souls to other religions or their poultry farms or their bad men God you see I made them understand 39peoples your regular fking raping cloning breeding animal farming is upsetting all strategies of Lord now how could Lord manage his own created religions previous birth formulas all you dictated in your books I said Your previous birth thementhesis etc every configuration made by Lord had gone upset because of scientific and lusty greedy sexy human Menn women lust for each other Wealthwomennwine will make them to decline and never shine I said nothing is permanently yours and mine All belong to Lord You Govinda and his advocated religion so refrain and get cautions from disturbing you otherwise if my religious Lord get furious you have to face dire consequences human as you know how He reacted in Kurekshtra s war But you see as it is kalayug people are no longer afraid of you Lord Just come down teach them a lesson once for all Announce them stop behaving like dengue mosquitoes And believe in you otherwise you would swallow the whole lot of human race entire human would extinct like dinosaurs Achaa tell me God did you wore same attire in dinosaurs ageyou carried same flute and cutting disc with you than too by the way Its just for my personal curiosity and incomplete knowledge gyan ok I will come to our religions first you see Lord The VishnuBrahmaShiva the sustainercreatordestroyer I explain using every triangle and geometry science and physics gellingnblending all scriptures well with history anatomyneconomy I explain my disciples You have to leave all dollsndames dollars and coins including this lust greed anger jealousy ego nothing will go along with you You have to leave naked I further tried to convince them that You the Lord is formless infinite omnipotent omnipresent omniscient etc many infinite cents and common sense dhoties kurtas pyjamas shirts pent pennies or penis all invention are your creativity Everything you have motivated and inspired human to create may be your idolsndeities or today s modern inventions as I also tried to elaborate them that All latest luxurious devices gizmos which we use today are gifted to human because of you my Lord I also tried to explain them why you were so simple and reluctant to use only cow ghee oil lamps to light your Raj Mahal and consideredntreated animals as your vehicles in your era and why you preferred not to get self change and live in ancient attire with your old fashion getups weapons bows and arrows etc without electricitybulbs ac fans When people in US called you Bush who killed millions of people just to catch and kill one Saddham Droyadhan comparing IraqnKurekshetra war I tried hard and got succeeded to convince many nuts but you know how devils atheist are I said Lord don t make bacteriangerms and he is interested to make only good bacteria to turn flourinbread milkincurd Dengue mosquitoes bird flues are all devils creations and my religious Lord never makenpromote them I said all Even a leaf can never breath livenleave without your consent my religious Lord I explained them all that you still are ageless timeless God Krish and you hold the universe in front of your vocal chord on your tongue beyond your nose base beneath your palate just secured in your 32 teeth Chapter 6 How Geeta Reached Us Lord there is one more question which those stupid atheist asks me often so can you now please tell me who were the paparazzi who noted eachnevery activities and contents of 1000s of characters in Mahabharata And How could Your Esteemed Holy Self with your buddy Arjuna were so calmly involvednfocused in Geeta Saar discourses and that too in the chaos of murderous battle field Were your villages so well equipped with informers writers news papers and news channels Lord I empathy rumours are being spread to sabotage your image From the day you went from earth many new Prophets popped up Many had formed their own religions Were their rebellions of our religions Today they cannot stand eye to eye Different Religions stare at each other implacably and doubts on one another in implausible manner Tolerance is no more Its same as in your days All want eye for an eye Just as you taught in Kurekshetra s war They say what you said in Geeta was already there in Vedas In a dramatic atmosphere of millions of bloodsheds and ripping shrieking screaming chaos of aggressivenunsympathetic crowd how could you managed to revealndiscourse all statements of Geetha Saar in such a calmncompose position in that carnage where millions of dead bodies of poor animalsnhumans were stinking crumbledndumped upon each otherPeople says the same Viraat Roop you could had exhibitedndisplayed to all at war including Droyadhan So many lives could have been saved if you had displayed your monstrous figure to them too So many families of soldiers never had traumatized stressed and wept Was it so difficult to convince or kill Droyadhan alone God Hadn t any of your magic and power worked You instigated Arjuna to kill his relativesthe matter you could have amicably solved with your dignified presence and farsightedness cum experience you took in your Ramayana days when you chose to became Ram You should have learnt from your own mistakes and past experiences Why did you left poor Sita just when a dhobi teased you Any way today we would discuss Mahabharata Dear Lord How could you allow so many murders during Mahabharata Those devil atheist were after my nerve all the time when I started discourses they popped up with so difficultndangerous questions I was unable to handle those piercing verbal missiles of those idiots And you know how difficult it was for me to change my profession Thousands of donors would have reached my neck if they had got the glimpse that I was changing my God bizLiving in this constant fear I anyhow started selling patanjali divya yoga packages and created a Ayurveda pharmacy firm also to give an eye wash I even entered politics you know how much black money of ministers are there in Swiss bank Lord People alleged that your previous birth of Shri Ram ji was so sober calmncool Revenge diplomatic conspiracy murders was not your only mission there Sustaining dedicated relations with step mothers brothers wife friends was your only aim there Sane peoples understands that It was circumstances which made you fight that cruel Villain Ravana to get back your sober dedicatedndevotional wife People understand you had no other option left in your Ramayana days You were so well organised principalized sober family orientedncommitted man when you acted as Ram When you posed Ram you never blew your own trumpet to broad cast you No where you showed your clouds and giant viraat roop praising yourself that you are God and the big Universe along with sun moon planets are just mustard seeds and peanuts all that belongs to you and so you hold all in your mouth under your palate etc Unlike your holy decent character in Ramayana People says you were keen to do your own advertisement in Mahabharata there by promoting yourself and never left any stone unturned to mesmerize married women How would you reacted if me Sai Jesus Nanak Mahavir Buddha did so You were always eager to kill your enemies I wonder how many other religious prophets emulated you Lord I hope you are not feeling bad by my outspokenness God but I am very very nervous in talking here with you But You see Lord I must not lie what people say behind your back after all i remain your loyal assistantnagent throughout out my career down there You very well know that I am not lying or manipulating this time A king or God should know what enemies are talking behind his back Isn t it Turning his eyes in disdain the Lord turned around to his other bodyguard and said in Sanskrit Fine take him to the other door It seem he is from Jesus s party Find out on google where Jesus s heavennhell is located exactly Few months back Christian heavennhell were shifted on Pluto as old structure had worn out and in dilapidated condition Moreover I hadn t understood a single word what he said What he was up to Explain him I am a Sanskrit God lived 5000 years ago of Christianity And yet not well versed in English Lipi yup The little what I understood is just because I had started taking tuitions from Jesus who meet me on 1111 The Global Gods Group Day As all Hindu Masters are giving discourses in English without even taking permission from our ancient organisation which consist over 330 million thousands of Sanskrit GodsnGoddessesso meanwhile unlike other fussy religious gods to update myself I have taken risk to learn from different religions popular finger counted Gods and am also giving tutorials to Jesus He is happily learning Sanskrit in return Sai Baba is teaching Hindi to me in Chanakya Font but his accent is bit KolahapuriMaharastrian type and you know I belong to Gokul Mathura Vrindavan Dwarka Cult from North India The leaders of Indian states are on logger heads And I was really not aware when so many new languages cultivated and took over specially this English Russian German Chinese I can learn from Buddha and Tao Japanese from Amaterasu I have to trace turkey or Moguls soul to learn Urdu Though they are difficult but I found them very interestingnimpressive I am also gearing up to learn Persian and Islamic languages from Shri Abraham Moses and Mohammed ji I also want to learn Punjabi from Guru Nanak ji Yes but omitting teri ma di teri pen di badwords MennWomen are so fascinating everywhere on my small planet God added to his darban in sanskrit We all religious Gods are also learning to surf Google and handle face book and will be launching direct blogs on Speaking Tree as we are not satisfied by the language our care takers promotersnpropaganders are using down the global lanes to glorify us If they are talking about me Make an announcement on twitter and face book and specially on TOI Speaking Tree Its growing popular internationally Their Indian Mytho Masters should speak only in Sanskrit or teach Sanskrit there to understand us better and no other language should be permitted After all heritage culture majab naam ki bhi koi cheez hoti hai The Sanskrit God used some such words in Hindi and blasted annoyingly Why they are mixing all languages when they better know we don t appreciate other religions heritages cultures and languages as do we honour ours Broad cast through Akashwani to all my followers mantrasnapplications will only be accepted by me in Sanskrit And also contact VJ or his Good Karma management to know what are the conditionncriteria applied to directly blog on ST And if our command on English or it s grammar is not upto the mark Would our discoursed articles and verses in Sanskrit still be pickednconsidered by the editor And check with the yamraj s department how much quantity of bhang they are allowed to put By Dr Lord Shiva in prasada and what dose of somras they add in that water given as welcome drink You see our aim is only to extract the truth out of dead souls and not to let them act as talkative drunk As Shiva was one of the best ancient surgeon who implanted an elephant head on his son Ganesha s body which he chopped in a petty quarrel with him so Krishna had learnt from Jesus what doctor means This Bhang canaibis sativa method was mere used as narco test on dead souls to know the truth out of them In festival like Holi drinking Bhaang also puts one in a state of bliss and dialog with God Author Naresh Sonee scribbled inbetween 2032012 to 2432012 True or False 1 Religious God only understand their own primitive language and tribal code mantras 2 We can connect to any Religious God and understand approach summon realize a particular AvatarProphet only if we know hisher primitive language mantras havans rituals hymes songs and wear only religious types of recommended tribalprimitive attires 3 Our Avatar is not at all interested in us if we talk or approach him using other s countries languages cultures offerings and festivals 4 Lord Krish Ram Lord Shiva shaved their beard in their era 5 Sanskrit God Krish actually don t know English 6 Indian God Krish knew English but he pretended that he did not knew foreign language This was just to avoid explanation to the modern saint 7 God Krish got irritated and hesitant so he purposely confused the modern saint to be taken to Jesus s Court so that Christ too ignore him as confused idiot creature and the modern saint s soul may never rest in peace and roam in air as he was mixing two language cultures and science Moreover he was a sinner because he doubted God Krish and tactfully knowingly insulted him because he was called off without notice 8 Bush and Lord Krish killed so many innocentnignorant animals and peoples just for one villain They both were ethicallynreligiously politicallynphilanthropically right 9 As Lord Krish was God he could had easily killed one man Droyadhan or one man Saddham with his magical sudarshan chakra and avoided the Kurekshetra s or Iraq s war which made millions of families and animals traumatic and distress 10 Lord krish never returned back in any avatars to teach the world lesson many wars that took place on earth He never came back to kill Hitler Napoleon etc who were more dangerous threat to man kind than Droyadhan 11 In Mahabharata s war many innocentnignorant elephants horses bulls camels were unnecessarily tortured and killed 12 Cruelty to innocent animalsnbeings making them vehicles to transport human and things are today termed as crimensin 13 Extra marital or illicit affairs should not be promoted or encouraged by moral bound religious civilized updated humans as it hurtsnharms infectsnaffects over all meditationsnwisdom of self including our own family lives May be parents spouses children relatives friends all sort of sentiments religiousnmoral code get affectedninfected Children mostly suffer and are affectedninfected by the behaviour of parents who has extra marital illicit affairs 14 Instead of raising self bustnstatues in their own ashrams every modern professional gurus should raise bustnstatues of Sant Ved Vyas ji and Valmikhi ji as they were the real gurus and they both are conditionless irrevocable Gurus of all professed doctorate gurus of today Without these two humble sincere non professional gurus the professional gurus of today can never achieve Hindutatva or Sanatan Dhram Gyan Guru bina gyan kahan so all gurus should not force their followers to worship self Instead of self Gurus of today should advice followers only to worship Guru Ved Vyas Guru Valmikhi as they are giving us all gyan and professional gurus of today are only translator of these 2 gurus literary works 15 Gurus of today must donate 80 of their donations to literate poor and cure health of distressndiseased poor people instead of building charged 7star ashrams and lavish temples for rich 16 Law of India should be amended We saintly Hindu religious human must be allowed to kill our enemies like Avatars did in our holy scriptures And we should also conspire to help our friends to kill their enemies as Lord Krish advocated so 17 We should not take Avatars killing in scriptures so seriously and never emulate such acts Similarly all odd things which are irrelevant and illogical in today s era that is told in scriptures must not be followed religiously and we have to changenmove ahead with updated spiritualism of non cruelty to innocent animalsn humans and restrain absolute tolerance and compassion 18 Sunnmoon riversnseas were summoned interrogated made hostages slappednsnapped bucklednclipped on hairs by Indian Avatars in their respective villages whenever where ever they wished 19 Its difficult for any religious Avatars to keep previousnpresent birth records of so many SOULS of chickens breeded and slaughtered poultry farms eggs abortions children taking birth by rape or fun donors sperms test tube babies Clones made by human Distressndiseased Humans dying form un hygiene aids hepatitis germs mosquitoes natural disaster etc The best way is to 20 EmpathynSympathy RespectnRegard CurenCare HelpnHeal of innocent beings are the best way to lead spiritual life This is the core essencensuggestion of Brahmand Pujan Research Foundation Copyright reserved with Naresh Soni Google Naresh Sonee to read more of his writings

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